As a man, it is very difficult to navigate this ever-changing world. At least it is for me and some friends I know. We’ve had a certain responsibility placed on our shoulders since the dawn of creation. This has been God’s design since day one and that hasn’t changed, ever. It’s a lot of pressure to deal with, but then I remember that the creator of the universe himself has entrusted me with great power. We all know that with great power comes great responsibility!! (Yes I used the famous Spider-man line). Since Genesis, Father God has given us men a job to do and though it’s tough it will ultimately be worth it. When I see my sons behaving or speaking in a way that reflects what they have learned from me I praise the Lord, because I learned from him. My beliefs seem out of date in this crazy world, but I have lived my life the way the world told me to and it bore no good fruit. Yet what society said was a lame way to live has brought me a new, invigorated, and passionate life.

“Walk in a manner worthy of the calling for which you’ve been called, with all humility and gentleness, with patience, showing tolerance for one another in love, being diligent to preserve the unity of the Spirit and the bond of peace.” -Ephesians 4:1-3 –

Throughout my 37 years, I have misunderstood manhood and the responsibility that comes with it. For most of my life, I always envisioned being the kind of man that could work super hard to provide and be the solid foundation that my family needs. That’s partly true, I am that, but what about who God has called me to be? As I mentioned earlier, I lived by society’s standard of manhood and I failed. I’ve dealt with depression, anxiety, isolation, and pressure like you wouldn’t believe trying to be the man the world said I should be. I couldn’t talk to my wife because I couldn’t show her I was struggling emotionally and mentally, so as to not show weakness. All the while I was standing on my last legs with no second wind in sight. By God’s grace, I was saved from that line of thinking, I had resources I rarely tapped into; The Bible and my wife. When I finally gave myself over to God’s will for my life is when I started becoming a man. After diving into Dr. Tony Evans’ book “Kingdom Man” is when I truly started to understand that what I’ve been taught about manhood was wrong! I didn’t have to be tough all the time, I didn’t have to do everything myself, and I surely didn’t have to keep my emotions to myself. At last, what my wife was begging me to do began to happen organically, and I started opening up about my weaknesses, failures, and fears. It was only when I started opening up about what was going on with me did I begin to move along God’s path. The healing that came from confession was and is amazing.

“It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him.” -Genesis 2:18-

As I started to find my footing in this faith walk something became very apparent to me, The wife and family I prayed for were gifted to me. That realization brought me back to Genesis 2:18 I was not meant to be alone, so why on earth was I shouldering all these burdens alone? The simple answer is that’s what the world taught me. Unlearning the false teachings of manhood has been an experience that has sort of blown my mind. Like learning that a man should be mostly raising the kids, that right there completely had me off-kilter. With this being counter to the culture today I see the fruits it produces and my family is better for it. Big ups to my wife for encouraging me to step into that role. God constantly reveals truths to me through his word and through people, whether it’s a kingdom man who has it going on or a man who made all the wrong decisions. These are powerful examples to learn from and I’m grateful for every trial I’ve survived because it has given me such strength. Knowing that God’s plan for manhood is about unity, love, peace, and understanding is the motivation that the world simply could not give me.

“For where two or three gather in my name, there am I with them.” -Matthew 18:20-

The responsibility of a man is great and scary, but it doesn’t have to be done alone. Other men are out there trying to accomplish the same goal with God’s help. I no longer keep up this false bravado when other guys are around, in fact, this is when I open up about the struggles of being a man of God, a husband, a father, a son, and a brother. You would be surprised at how so many other men are going through very similar situations. Allowing ourselves to be vulnerable with our brothers in Christ creates the perfect avenue to learn how The Lord has worked through others. As weird as seems to some I’ve made it my business to tell other men I love them whenever I can because they too are image-bearers. This is Christ’s request; to love others like you love yourself and I love me, so how could I not love them? If you’ve never been part of a men’s group I implore you to join one, even if it’s just once and you’ll see kingdom men riding the Way/ve of manhood.

Thank you For taking the time to read this post today, you are and will always be appreciated. Manhood has been warped by false teachings but is actually rooted in God’s plan for the world. If we as men choose to draw closer to Him, He will draw closer to us The choice is ours to keep seeking after a kingdom love and to keep chasing God’s Way/ve.